I Am Indeed a Scientist

I really needed cheering up today. So, I formulated my answer to "Ed the Water Guy". Poor Ed...

Here goes!! =) Enjoy Ya'll...
Mr Ed H,
We met at the Pittsburgh Blues Festival, Saturday, July 25th. You challenged me to try your product, and, whether it worked or didn’t, to send an email, and let you know. You would either use me as an advertisement for your Perfect Water, or you’d send me to some scientists to prove I’m still wrong. You told my boyfriend he “must have big hands to deal with me, because I’m a handful”. We’re still laughing about that – I am a handful, but I’m also an amazing scientist.

Well, as a Chemist, I conducted a very detailed study. On both occasions, I kept every condition I could the same except for the water.
Saturday (To ensure a good night’s rest the night before, something not always achieved during the work week)
Hazy, Hot, Humid (let me clarify – South Texas H, H, and H – Heat Indeces near 110F)
All “Human Conditions” nearly the same (use your imagination & interpret that one), eliminating unscheduled water retention
I worked some in the yard (one time, I was busy with routine chores, another time I mowed the backyard with a push mower, both about an hour tasks)
I rode one horse for about 45 minutes, with a few minutes for free longe warm up before mounting
I cooled down the horse, fed them their supper
Came inside, and retrieved the water from the refrigerator

Drank the water
Swiftly, but not gulped…
And I waited approximately 30 minutes for “results”.

My study as you see is performed with only one variable as best I could control it. I don’t have infinite power over the weather, though I wouldn’t mind doing so. I also don’t have infinite power over my body (otherwise, I can only imagine how intellectual our conversation would have been).

My study conclusion? … (drum roll please…….)
Your Perfect Water doesn’t perform any better than the city water that undergoes 12 steps of filtration that I purchase from the water coolers in (My Hometown), Texas.

Sorry, sir, but I didn’t feel any more energized, I didn’t bound across my house gleefully, and I in fact, found myself still quite thirsty after drinking both products. One bottle just isn’t enough in the Texas Sun, even one bottle of Perfect Water.

It was a fun experiment, though.

Thanks!